Monday, April 5, 2010

The Taurus/Scorpio axis and Nature spirits

I have some trouble making up my mind as to what this blog is all about: What does it mean to me, why did I start it, what is the purpose of keeping it going? As I wrote in my last post, I feel that the blog reflects my 5th house/Scorpio, where I have Uranus conjunct North Node. Sitting by myself, moving deep into my psyche (Scorpio), and creatively (5th house) putting it all together by connecting it to astrology (Uranus) - and the North Node part of it "simply" giving me a feeling of doing something very close to my true path - it all did feel very important and rewarding for me. I also did start building a website that would be the basis of trying to practice my skills (if any) in chart reading, and possibly one day trying to do this professionally (even if that of course would require some formal training). As transiting Uranus is on my MC right now, I've had a lot of thoughts, plans, and not least anxieties around vocation, and with both the ruler of my MC (Neptune) and Uranus natally in the 5th house, I did get a very strong feeling that THIS was my true vocation!

As those of you who have been following this blog know, something else came up, and it is my deep hope that this new endeavour is also an important piece of the puzzle as to the understanding and finding of my vocational path. But I do tend to worry that this new endeavour is something that is representational of my South Node (in Taurus), and which would thus be a kind of regression instead of positive evolution. Now, I do know that things are not that black-or-white, but it seems I really have a need to sort these things out a bit, to know deeply my motives for beginning this course in egological farming/gardening. I think it may well be partly a reconnection to past lives issues, I just hope that it is a positive reconnection - one that reactivates important previous knowledge - rather than a pull-back. I have written quite a lot about Chiron also in this blog, and Chiron in my chart is losely conjunct the South Node. I have had Chiron transited (by trine) by Pluto recently, and so Chiron has become kind of activated in my psyche/soul. This is something entirely positive and really should convince me that I am on the right path here...!

I would really like to better understand the interplay of both the 5th/11th house axis, and the Taurus/Scorpio axis. I just found this interesting post on a forum (http://www.mysticalwonders.org/group/about2098.html):
My guess is you probably have a struggle with the material security driven side in you and the more instinctive spiritual deep side in you. The pull will be the cross between the necessaty to survive and compromise and feel secure with others, and breaking away from the material to find some kind of new beginning where the hidden nature of things becomes primary in your daily functions, I mean, sticking with that gut feeling, or vision, or whatever and seeing where it goes, how deep the rabbit hole goes. If you have strong Scorpio leaning in your chart, there will be something very strong inside you that needs mystical experiences, but the Taurean side will favour necessity over the life or death attitude of Scorpio, and death can occur in terms of release of old ways, life of new. [...] Also the polarity of the Scorpio Taurus axis is often linked with (if you believe) past-life in Witchcraft and magic, so there may be a powerful witch within you.
This rings very deep and true to me. Both the part of the Taurus energy representing material security needs, and the witchcraft/magic thing. I do not like to think that I may have (subconsciously) embarked upon this course to get that good feeling of knowing what to do every day, and having a secure, although low, income during these few months! But I do like the idea that this endeavour may be a good way to reconnect with a heritage that I resonate with - that of the wise woman who understands the natural world so well that she can work with it through "magic" - co-create with it. I am beginning to understand that an essential part of this course, for me, is about understanding that nature really is alive, not metaphorically but literally, in that the natural world is built and sustained by nature spirits, that we need to cooperate with.
To me it is really interesting to think of Taurus/Scorpio as Demeter/Persephone, and as the Ground/the Underground. It has a lot of pertinence to understanding my own motivations for doing what I'm doing right now! Thank you for reading this, and I truly hope that you have received some good input as to your own Taurus/Scorpio-, or 2nd house/8th house-, or even Venus/Pluto energy interplay! Please know that I would greatly appreciate to hear any thoughts that you might like to share here, by posting a comment below.

Sending wishes for much love and joy to you all!
Anna